If you want to have a broken heart, give it to a dog to love, for sure.
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With children and dogs, your mistakes always show.
Home to Beautiful Borzois in the Watchung Mountains in Mountainside, New Jersey
If you want to have a broken heart, give it to a dog to love, for sure.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
With children and dogs, your mistakes always show.
One day you awaken and lean into a beam of light that guides your steps – day –
You lean toward it harder in another measure – night –
To find your dreams and destiny
Though others strive to steal your treasure.
I live by resilience and faith to compensate
for that which others have robbed me with some success – betrayal
For others, oh them, they will be so envious.
Following are a series of thoughts and memories in note form in response to news about Tresor and musings about Paris and Casanova. No judgments are intended.
About Tresor, Mikhailya’s puppy from her only litter.
…..I responded by gently but firmly asking them to return him to me. At least they know it is an option. I told them the difference between now and when I gave him to them is that I have LT, and he has to live with a very strong man who can establish dominance over him. That is not happening in his present home. This may not the dog for them.
It is really interesting. I had a nightmare about this very topic, life at their home. In the dream, I had learned that Tresor was crated nine hours a day while they went to work, and he was miserable, and his behavioral issues were getting worse. I had to consider putting him down as an option. It was horrible, and I wondered then if I shouldn’t call her. But, I sent her an email message about the two of us, she and I, bringing Tresor up to Pennsylvania together to see R. and J. Z., who wanted to evaluate him to determine if he were in show condition. In her email to me yesterday, the wife told me he was not. So, that pretty much says it. If I do not hear from them in a week, I will contact them again.
About Casanova.
I had another nightmare last night. This one was about our first beloved Blyss borzoi, “Casanova”. He had cancer and arthritis, and extremely bad dog aggression that had worsened over the years. He was eleven and was dying. I believe I tried to reach out to his breeder at the time, I know I did. I believe I asked him to call me. In my dream, it was as if he called me today, in the present. I told him that I had to put Casanova down last year. He took it badly, he really suffered, and he had a break-down. I felt so guilty it was horrible. I tried to comfort him, and to apologize, but he would not be comforted. He said I broke the contract of sale, and I was wrong. I had tried to contact him in advance of euthanasia, but could not reach him at the time or since. It went on and on like that, and I could not make it right for him. I guess I feel very badly and guilty about putting poor Casanova down. Today, I remember waking up with a horrible migraine. It was a really difficult moment in time.
So owning these special dogs, and then, co-owning them with breeders who insist on being control freaks, can be heartbreaking for the buyer – owner. I can recall additional stories in my kennel that were very painful to me as well, especially concerning K. S.-C., but what’s the point. Without the breeders you would not have their borzoi so you tolerate much from them, try to be supportive of them and stay on their good side.
About Paris:
Even though I placed Tresor and Paris together in a loving home nearby after my husband died, and in so doing it made my life considerably easier, I never forgot them. They were a daily memory, as are the other two puppies that Karen received and subsequently sold. But all the good intentions in the world will be of no use if the placement is wrong or simply does not work out for unforeseen reasons. And sometimes one cannot determine that until after it is done.
This is the most difficult part of breeding dogs, the emotional part, worrying about what becomes of them when they leave your kennel. Having bred one litter, I would never do it again. Let’s just say I am too old for this and certainly lacking in the financial resources to do it right. But, if I can have my one Mikhailya puppy returned to me, I would probably be most happy about that outcome. I tried to suggest it as gently as I could to the family. Perhaps they are ready for that. As for Blyss Kennels, Paris is gone now, too. This leaves the door open for the next stage, Blyss Kennels Encore, so to speak! A new version, a new kennel, but do let it be wiser.